De-stress at Work by Focusing on Your Best 20%

Posted on January 2011 | 1 Comment

In my last post, I offered a few questions to help you think differently about 2010 and 2011. One of the things I like best about these questions is seeing what’s working, what’s not and what needs to change.

One humongous, much-needed change glaring me in the face centered on my business and the way I work. The last couple of years have been anything but normal.

After a painfully slow (and I mean slooooow!) 2009, I was crazy busy in 2010. Last year gave credibility to the proverb “all work and no play makes (Jill) a dull (girl).”

Moving from a complete halt to breakneck speed is challenging, to say the least. Sometimes I think I want to pursue balance in my work. But when I evaluate further, is balance really the goal…for any of us? Or do we simply want to work within our strengths for as long as possible?

Your Best 20%

If that’s the case maybe we should be focusing on working in our best 20% for 80% of the time, rather than pursuing “balance.”

You know what I mean. Your best 20% is your “sweet spot.” And when you hit it, time stands still. You’re working away, happily engrossed in the task-at-hand, and then you look up. It’s 5:00. Where did the day go?

Focusing on your best 20% means playing to your strengths  so you’re less stressed and more excited about your work. The results can be anything from a smoother work day to feeling refreshed at quitting time to being incredibly productive.

According to Tim Ferris, author of The 4-Hour Workweek:  “The opposite of happiness is…boredom. Excitement is the more practical synonym for happiness, and it is precisely what you should strive to chase. It is the cure-all.”

rekindle your excitement

What gets you excited about your work? Is it your best 20%? (More than likely, it is!) Can you streamline your activities so you’re working in your best 20% most of the time? And don’t immediately respond with “No way! I can’t do that!”

Have you tried?

I’m adjusting my office hours so, when I write (my best 20%), I’m more focused. I’m also challenging myself to get my first thoughts down faster in order to let creativity (more of my best 20%) flourish. And both my clients and I benefit!

Even though none of us can work in our best 20% all the time, we can find small ways to tweak our activities and create a more pleasant way to work. Have fun discovering your best 20%, and let me know how it goes!

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Posted in 80-20 rule, personal development, personal growth

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Communicating a Need

Posted on January 2011 | 2 Comments

Communicating authentically is refreshing. It makes life richer and much more fulfilling. I love that I have friends and family I can communicate with freely.

But even then, one of the most difficult things to communicate is when you have a need. Whether you need love or money or just a few minutes of being heard, communicating a need is hard even for the best communicators.

Why? It puts you in a place of vulnerability, and that’s uncomfortable. And no one wants to be uncomfortable, right?

Last year, car trouble forced me into that uncomfortable spot. Since I’m a one-car family, being car-less is pretty painful. I couldn’t get anywhere except the library and WalMart, which are both within walking distance. I couldn’t even make it to church for rehearsals.

An Important Life Lesson

In Colorado, I had a friend who was barely making it financially. When someone offered something,  whether it was freshly baked bread, shoveling her sidewalk or a little cash, she always said yes.

I commented, “I wish I could accept help that easily.” She calmly looked at me and said, “But why not accept? I really appreciate the help, and they know that. If they want to bless me, why would I take that away from them?”

I’d never thought of it that way. My self-involved thinking was more concerned with the way things “looked,” rather than seeing that the blessing goes both ways.

I started being more receptive to this and, eventually, changed my mindset. Now when people offer help,  I don’t stutter or fumble around. I don’t immediately say, “Oh, you don’t have to do that.” I just take a moment to think, then I answer. And many times, the answer is yes, thank you.

Back to my Car Story…

When I expressed my car-less state to one friend, she lent me her car for a couple of days. Another friend gave me a ride home from the auto shop. A third friend drove across town to pick me up for weekend church activities. And referrals for honest mechanics came quickly. It was one of the most refreshing weeks of my life.

What about you? Can you change your mindset? I discovered that it’s not that hard, once I checked my ego at the door.

Next time someone offers help, say yes. Or when you need help, ask. You may be surprised by the number of blessings that come your way.

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Saying Goodbye to 2010, Welcoming 2011!

Posted on December 2010 | 1 Comment

Are you excited about ringing in 2011? I know I am! I always feel like it’s a time filled with possibility and wonder. On the cusp of a new year, it seems that anything is possible whether you change your hairstyle, your address or your entire life.

That said, I’m not much for resolutions. I prefer to re-evaluate regularly throughout the year. Yet I feel that every year deserves an appropriate ending. A bit of retrospection. A “mini-review,” if you will.

I have a list of questions that were given to me years ago, but I don’t know who authored them. All I know is that my creativity partner Liz and I look forward to doing them every year. It’s an opportunity to look back at the past year and look ahead to the next 12 months.

Life Isn’t a Dress Rehearsal
I’m a goal-oriented person. I like having something to get me out of bed each morning. I enjoy allowing my creative juices to flow without limits or boundaries. It’s in these moments of daydreaming that I discover the true desires of my heart:  What’s important to me, what intrigues me, what I’m passionate about and more.

I don’t understand people who don’t set goals, large or small. These folks have a tendency to play victim to their circumstances and use excuses like “I’m too busy,” “My kids keep me running,” “Work is crazy right now,” etc.

But circumstances shouldn’t be running the show, should they? Life is a series of choices that are made moment-by-moment. Why not let 2011 be your year to choose differently? Get out of your comfort zone. Take a little “me time.” Consider, ponder and even wrestle with the thoughts, ideas and daydreams floating around in your head. That way, you can define the things that are important to you and get a plan for achieving them.

You can download and complete these questions, or use the method or tool that works best for you. The main thing is that you take your first step toward a more satisfying, more fulfilling life.

I wish you a refreshing, productive and successful 2011, whether you’re taking baby steps or big steps in your journey. Have a blessed and Happy New Year!

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Posted in New Year, personal development, personal growth, resolutions

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Respect the Season of Life You’re In

Posted on December 2010 | 2 Comments

‘Tis the season for parties and receptions and open houses. This past week, my calendar was bulging at the seams from several business-related events. At this time of year, folks enjoy getting together with colleagues, co-workers, clients and friends to ring in the season with a flair and a flourish.

As I was looking at my schedule in November, I had an “Aha” moment. I wanted to schedule in a few performances with ComedySportz, a comedy group offering family-friendly improvisation (I’m a member of the resident troupe). I was frustrated as I tried to fit everything in. Then I had a moment of clarity as I thought, “You need to respect this season of life .” So I let go of the scheduling and took a deep breath.

You see, I learned a long time ago that life — like everything else — has its own ebb and flow. We’ve all experienced it:  You may be crazy busy with work or family stuff for a few months then, at last, you have a quiet moment to catch your breath. After the busyness, you probably appreciated the breather more than normal, didn’t you?

I’ve been working my buns off since January. I’m so blessed and so thankful for the abundance of work, especially after a painfully slow 2009. But with that overwhelming amount of work came few, if any, moments to relax.

Now that we’re nearing the end of the year, workload is slowing. I have time to get my paperwork done and prepare for 2011. I have time to reignite my marketing efforts with an eLearning course. I even have time to socialize, reflect on the meaning of Christmas, and relax.

“Respecting your season of life” doesn’t mean you’re permanently shunning or pushing away people or activities you enjoy. It simply means being mindful of your ebb and flow. Respecting and honoring others starts with respecting and honoring yourself.

So while I love performing improv and making people laugh, I have to respect this season of life — my ebb — and know that letting go of a few activities now means I’ll be refreshed and back in the flow again in January!

What about you? Have you ever struggled to let go of commitments so you could respect the season of life you were in? How did you feel once it was done? Happy? Regretful? Relieved?

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Posted in personal development, personal growth

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A Different Gift-Giving Perspective

Posted on November 2010 | 1 Comment

Have you started shopping for gifts yet? As we head into the holiday season, I wanted to share a couple of gift-giving thoughts with you. It’s simplified gift-giving to me and helps me be respectful of the vow of simplicity I took a number of years ago. I also want to re-embrace the mindfulness that helps me focus and keep my home clutter-free.

I wrote my family a letter a few months ago. After a garage sale I was ecstatic about all the extra space in my home, so I had a couple of specific requests for gifts this year:

  • Gifts that are consumable. That means it can be “used up,” whether it’s a gift card or food or something shared. With this comes my commitment to giving something away when something is bought. That way, others can benefit and be blessed by it.
  • A focus on experiences over things.  We took a trip to South Padre in June, and it helped me realize that the gift of being with family means more to me than the “stuff.” Hanging out on the beach with them was so lovely, and lazily floating in inner tubes around Schlitterbahn, a waterpark, was perfect.

You may be saying, “But I don’t want to spend extra time with my family,” and that’s okay too. Gift-giving is personal. It should matter to the recipient, but it should bring you joy as well.

That being said, my family doesn’t have to embrace  this mindset. I will happily continue giving them gifts that they want and will enjoy. I didn’t  include my nephew in this because he’s still a kid. If he wants a certain gift at Christmas, why not give it to him? Funny thing is, he’s hitting an age where he really likes gift cards!

One important gift-giving note:  It doesn’t have to be extravagant or expensive. You can be a tourist in  your own town, get cheap seats for a sporting event, or take a day-trip somewhere for sightseeing and lunch. The goal is simply to be together and enjoy each other in a different environment.

Consider changing your perspective on giving gifts this year. Tailor it for your specific needs. Who knows? It could be the beginning of a new holiday tradition in your family.

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Posted in personal growth, simplicity

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A Brief Betrayal

Posted on November 2010 | Leave a comment

I’ve been a little depressed lately. Since my birthday in May my knees have started to ache, neck and shoulder pains wake me at night and, in the midst of a root canal, my jaw gave out.

This feels weird because I’ve been active all my life — cheerleading, tennis, cycling, running, dancing, skiing, flag football and more. I enjoy watching sports (live, of course), and consider myself a flavor-of-the-month exerciser. I’ve felt “the burn” with Jane Fonda  and was practicing yoga before yoga classes came with a gym membership.

Yet in spite of this — or perhaps because of it — my body is rebelling. Having a tantrum. Whining and creaking with every move.

Somehow, I feel betrayed. In spite of my love/hate relationship with its size, I’ve always had a body that worked. Sure, I’d have the occasional injury but with a little rest and ibuprofen, I healed quickly. But since I had a serious fall in 2003, I discovered that speedy healing can’t be taken for granted.

So, what to do?

Get Movin’!
One great thing about stubbornness is that it can be “redefined” as persistence or perseverance and people think it’s admirable. In this case — no matter what you call it — it worked in my favor.

Since my knees prevent any serious at-home workouts, I joined a gym. Now, I’m diggin’ the elliptical machines. I can get in a sweaty workout without knee and back pain. I’m sleeping better, have more energy and am beginning to feel like my old self again (pun intended).

I’ve also committed to regular massages and actually enjoy getting out of bed in the morning. I’m cooking more and eating better, which means my state-of-mind is improving too. And Pilates, yoga and weights are balancing things out nicely. It’s funny how feeling good physically can cure even my worst moods.

Forgiveness and Wisdom
 Author Philip Yancey wrote, “Behind every act of forgiveness lies a wound of betrayal….”

Well, the betrayal has occurred. Now it’s time to forgive. I’ll forgive my body for showing the wear-and-tear of my years. Besides, I hear that with age comes wisdom. Forgiving and accepting seems to be the wisest thing I can do.

What about you? Have you ever had a moment when you realized something had changed permanently? What did you do?

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Posted in personal growth

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New Location of this Blog

Posted on November 2010 | Leave a comment

This blog has been moved to my new blog, “Listening to My Life…” and can be found at http://blog.MichelleZavala.com.

The individual domain name of this blog is http://cleanandkeen.wordpress.com.

Communication and creativity topics will continue to be covered, along with more personal stories and observations. Thanks for reading!

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Simplicity redefined

Posted on September 2010 | Leave a comment

Every now and then I read a blog post that inspires me. This is one of those posts from zenhabits, a brief guide to life.

I like this post because it offers good advice and excellent links. It’s as simple as that. Check it out and let me know what you think!

Have a refreshing and productive day!

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Posted in creative living, creativity, reading

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Are you “that guy?”

Posted on August 2010 | Leave a comment

Communication comes from the inside out, whether we like it or not.  It lets people know what’s really going on inside of us, no matter how good our facade is.

I recently posted this on Facebook:

Michelle Zavala got bumped from behind while in traffic. Fortunately, no damage to car, only to a very upset 16-year-old who just kept saying, “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.” Tried to calm her down, telling her that everyone’s done it at least once and if they said they didn’t, they probably weren’t telling the truth, heh.

My heart went out to her as I remembered my first fender-bender. It was in the high school parking lot, and  I was an absolute mess about it. Fortunately, the guy whose car I hit was pretty calm. That made it all a little easier to take.

This girl was a bit of a mess too, and I wanted to be sure I didn’t upset her any more. I kept things light (and yes, I took her information, just in case). She gave me her number and asked that I call her first if any damage showed up. I said sure but unless something fell off of my car, I probably wouldn’t need to call. She seemed relieved and said, “Thank you for being so nice about all this, thank you so much.”

I said, “No problem” then got into my car. I wondered, was I really that nice? Or was I just being a decent human being?

After my status update I asked, “When was your first fender-bender?” I received a lot of comments from Facebook friends telling their stories (thus proving my comment that we’ve all done it!). One person said there wasn’t any damage to the cars but the guy made a big deal out of it.

That got me thinking. We’re all only one deep breath away from being kind or being “that guy”  (a gender-neutral term).

You know “that guy.” It’s the person who had a bad day at work or has screaming kids in the car and wants to take it out on you.

“That guy” is the jerk who makes a big deal out of the most insignificant thing.

“That guy” is the person who speaks before thinking and is clueless about how foolish his or her behavior looks to others.

“That guy” is the person actively seeking out a reason to rant, rave, turn red in the face and be nasty for no particular reason.

You don’t want to be “that guy,” do you?

Then don’t do it. Next time the option to be “that guy” presents itself, take a deep breath and let it out slowly before you speak. You’ll be glad you did.

Wishing you a refreshing and productive day, without any run-ins with “that guy.”

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Posted in communication, interpersonal communication

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Making the Rule of Three personal

Posted on August 2010 | Leave a comment

In my business blog, I recently posted how the Rule of Three can help your focus at work. Then I started wondering how I could incorporate it into my personal life. What are the three things that keep me focused personally? I think this is the first draft of my 3 things:

1.  Use my “best” time of the day for personal stuff.
I like getting up by 6:30 a.m., whether it’s a weekday or weekend. I’m a morning person and can generally get more done before noon than I do for the rest of the day.

I recently started doing personal stuff like God time, workouts and creative projects in the morning. I run errands and do laundry then too. I aim to be at my desk by 11, even though I generally get there by about 10:30. The rest of the day is committed to clients, without distractions. Much nicer…

2. Take care of the temple.
Eating clean and working out are necessities for me. I can’t function fully without both. I’m amazed as I watch friends eat a lot of processed and sugary foods. I can do it for a little while, but long-term? No way! I guess I’m just a big baby when it comes to food.

I’ve been a vegetarian by choice for 15 years, and gluten-free (not by choice) for 2 years. Though I eat well, I don’t have enough variety in my diet. I recently ran into a friend who is Korean. She was giving me some great ideas for cooking quick Korean meals. I was intrigued and decided to learn how to cook a few dishes. I don’t have a clue what I’m doing but hey, new learning experience, right?

I really liked this post on the five greatest foods for your health. I’ll be learning how to do more with these 5 foods too. I love that I can actually eat all of them!

I think learning to cook a wider range of foods will also help me lose the 5 pounds I gained on vacation. I just want to button my pants easily again!

3.  Creativity, learning and growth.
Making time is the hardest part of this one. For example, I started this blog at the end of May and this is only my 3rd or 4th post. Kinda lame, I know, but I’ll be adding this blog to the creativity, learning and growth bucket so it’ll actually get done.

Those are my three things. Forget work for a minute and think about your personal life:  What  three things do you do that keep you at your best?

It’s your life. Listen well.

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Posted in personal development, personal growth, spiritual growth